If you’ve been following my posts of late, then you know how much courage has become part of my life. And as a writer, I need constant doses of courage. I highly relate to the journey Destiny speaks of – read on to learn a unique and different perspective of courage.
The Courage to Write My Story
I’m not brave.
Fear slithers snake-like in my belly at least a couple of times a day.
Every time I think about someone I know reading The Romance Diet, I want to run away.
Writing a memoir isn’t easy. Writing a story like this one, where I’m baring me and my husband, is downright hard, but it isn’t brave.
Brave is showy. It’s wild. It used to mean bully, assassin, or someone who wore fine clothes. Now, it means something else, but that something isn’t me and writing The Romance Diet was not a brave act.
It was an act of love. An imperative about which I had no choice. When people ask where I found the courage, I don’t really have a response.
You see, technically courage means having the mental or moral strength to venture, persevere, and withstand danger, fear, or difficulty. This is something we all do all the time. None of us like it, but our choice is do it or die. You are courageous. So am I. It takes courage to fall in love, have a child, or hug a friend while they cry.
Courage means heart.
I have one. So do you. Our hearts beat. They break. They bleed and roar. In the span of a second they can shatter or soar. The only way we stand it, the only way we endure, is by sharing the glory, beauty, and horror of what we know.
I wrote The Romance Diet for me. For my husband. For us. It helped us see where we’d been and where we’re going. It was a bridge from personal hell to personal joy.
I could have left it there. Could have left the draft sitting in a drawer. It would have been enough to know it was there. But then, as what we learned started sinking in, I knew I had to do more.
I gave it to a few friends to see what they thought. The women read it and then we talked and talked. Every single one of them asked, “Can I share it with my husband? He’ll finally know who I am.”
Their husbands read it and said, “I don’t get it. She was fine and then she went nuts.”
I went back to work and crafted new drafts. I honed in on the feedback until the men did get it, until they wanted to talk.
As the final draft approached completion, I knew that sharing the glory, beauty, and horror of what my husband and I lived through meant publishing the book. That, too, was an act of love. An imperative about which I had no choice. The book is my whisper to you. You are not alone. Neither am I. We’re in this together whether we know each other or not. We don’t have to stand it or merely endure. We can make it better. We can share stories and open our hearts.
Brave, raw, and unflinchingly honest, this book is a weight loss journey, a love story, a heart beating loudly on the page. Every day we battle against something–injustice, our spouses, our weight. Seldom do we acknowledge the real wars we wage. Repressing feelings and silencing our voices, we suffer under the surface, attributing emotional distress and unwanted pounds to the inescapable effects of hormones or age.
But weight gain, anxiety, and marital difficulties aren’t always so easy to explain.
In her poignant and touching memoir, Allison doesn’t offer recipes, exercise tips, or advice. Instead, she shows us how to stand up, express what we want, and develop empathy for ourselves and the people we love. In doing so, she provides invaluable insight for those seeking to lose weight, save a marriage, or make a significant life change.
Includes a Readers Guide.
About the Author:
Destiny Allison was a professional and award-winning sculptor. Her work is collected by individuals, civic entities, and corporations worldwide. When an injury required her to re-envision her life, Allison did what she always does. She applied her explosive creativity and dog-with-a-bone tenacity to new endeavors.
In 2011 she was named Santa Fe Business Woman of the Year. Her community building efforts and innovative business model transformed a bankrupt shopping center into a thriving community and commercial center.
In 2012 she published her first book, Shaping Destiny: A quest for meaning in art and life. The book won best independent non-fiction/memoir in the 2013 Global Book Awards.
Since then, she has published two novels and opened a general store.
Allison believes that one’s life is one’s greatest work of art. Hence, she flows freely between mediums. Unafraid to make mistakes and always passionate, she lives in Santa Fe, NM.
More info at: www.destinyallisonbooks.
Facebook: Destiny Allison Books
Twitter: sfsculptor
Thanks so much for sharing this thought-provoking story. It provides hope and inspiration.
Thank you! We all need hope and inspiration and your comment gave me both. Thanks so much for reading!
Yes, very true. Thank you, Destiny!
Thank you for a great guest post, Destiny, and thanks to Dorit for hosting. Courage is the main thing lacking in my writing right now, and this is helping me take one step closer to finding my true voice.
I’m so glad to hear that this post was helpful, Renee. Thank you so much for giving me the opportunity.